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How do you deal with a screaming father when

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  • How do you deal with a screaming father when

    The MP's show up knocking at your door with a Chaplin in tow? OMG..I never in a million years dreamed anything like this would happen in real life and yet....tonight it did. I was at my best friends Sisters house fixing her computer when they knocked on the door...19 God damned years old! Pissed? Yeah I'm pissed...Movies can't even come close to the emotion I was witness to tonight. Mark and I lost a Daughter at birth and even I couldn't tell these parents that I know how they feel..I didn't raise Izzy for 19 years, watch her graduate High School then Boot Camp...I didn't watch her get on the plane that would "Make him a Man" My daughter died in my arms...Jimmy died thousands of miles away in the arms of a foreign Country..I couldn't stay...I had to leave..I couldn't bear their pain.
    Sorry I had to vent...I don't think I have ever been this angry before

    My Bud's 'R' Marion, Verleen and Jormanoy
    Love is not blind. It sees more not less and because it sees more, it's willing to see less.

  • #2
    Oh Liz, how awful you had to witness that. It had to be horifying. I don't think anyone would be able to understand that type of pain unless you actually experienced it. So sorry to hear about this. My thoughts are with you are your friends.


    • #3
      I have a lump in my throat! Here I am a 2 x veteran and also was a dependent wife. Here I live in a military community where many of our troop are deployed now or just got back. Again, about half of my students are the dependents of these brave soldiers. Every day or so, we get reports of others who have fallen. Yes, we are at war and this whole situation is not pretty.

      Currently, I have 2 son-in-laws in Iraq and 1 nephew, with another nephew believed to be in Iraq. In June, my son, Josh is going into the Air Force. We all need to remember, this war is terrible and we must keep our military and their families in our prayers.

      I can not imagine being at anyone's home, when they received such terrible news. I know that had to be extremely emotional and difficult for you too.

      My thoughts and prayers are with you and your friends!

      My Buddies are Maggie Mae, Knzus,Gotart, Patty, Mom7911, Winnie49, JAMIEPT, TWPClerk, and Poppabob



      • #4
        I have no words - I am just so sorry - it all seems so useless.


        • #5
          All the while, the 16 months my son was deployed to Iraq, I tried to prepare myself, just incase this would happen to me and I would have to deal with this. I layed awake nights worrying and thinking. I still can not imagine it! I am so sorry Liz! I don't know why God spares some and takes others....


          • #6
            Oh dear Lord in Heaven! We are sending up rounds and rounds of prayers for everyone there! This immediately brought me near to choking with my crying. I don't know the grief...but I know the fear.

            Jerry and I live every day wondering if this will happen to us...his oldest son, my cousins, a few other close family members. We know sure enough that, yes, the probability is high since we have so many relation serving. God has protected far. But we also live with a different kind of anger, too -- so I *think* I can partially relate to the anger you felt during those moments.

            {{HUGZ}} and prayers for comfort to the family, and to you and yours.

            Be good to your favorite designer (I used to be one!) by LETTING THEM KNOW how much you appreciate their work!


            • #7
              OOOoo this is a nightmare .This is so heart wrenching for these people and you to be there must of been just awful.I cannot imagine this type of pain.I once had a sister that was killed by another car that had booze in it and though she was dead 6 hours we were not told though we were her family---they would not give us any info if it was her or not.We heard from others and then had to wait. Not pleasant.But this is just awful.I hope they will be okay.My heart and prayers go to this family.
              My Buddies -- Sue, Smiles, Jazzereal, Eng, Crops, Terry & Wolvsie35 , Onie, Marion, Jenna's Mommy, All My Memories, Winnie49, Tiffanys Scraps, Grannywin,emst


              • #8
                it's awful when a family is told that their loved one's have passed away, i was the SSAFA grief liason during the first gulf war & bonsinia conflict for the regiment where my (ex) husband was stationed, i had to accompany the families office and chaplin when we visited 5 different wives on the same day to tell them their husbands had all died in a helicopter crash.

                anger is a normal reaction so is violence, just let your friends be aware you are there for them, help in practical ways like making sure they eat, help with the funeral arrangements, help them when contacting family members, let them talk and cry etc, in time suggest grief councelling/ support groups as it really does help.

                all you can be is the rock that supports them at this time, everyone reacts in different ways but no matter how they react just knowing you were there for them is a great help.

                my prayers of strength are with them and you at this time

                fiona xx

                An Exclusive Scrapbook Max designer
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                "If you look around and think the world is missing something, it is probably the gift you were supposed to be bringing."


                • #9
                  This is what I know so far

                  As of 2:40 this afternoon we have no word on HOW Jimmy was killed. His parents at this point are just praying he is in one piece, they need an open casket...his mom keeps saying she needs to SEE her son to believe it is true. It will be AT LEAST 7 or more days till they can fly his body home. Danny and Judy had to sign all sorts of papers and prove they are who they make sure the Army has the right set of parents. I gave Tina (My friend) my car for a few days so she can stay right there with her sister (They are the only 2 in their family left) The L-ville American Legion called me to find out when Jimmy is coming home because they want to give him a Military home Coming ...I guess Vets and all of the area school students line up along main Street and Salute him as they drive him by they will be doing this in his Hometown the day of his funeral also.

                  Thank you all for your prayers. this poor family needs them.

                  My Bud's 'R' Marion, Verleen and Jormanoy
                  Love is not blind. It sees more not less and because it sees more, it's willing to see less.


                  • #10
                    Thanks for the update. Prayers will continue.


                    • #11
                      Prayers, Prayers, Prayers

                      Prayer is the one thing that is definately needed at this time. And I know that you have mine and a lot of other people's.


                      My buddies are Granny, Wolvsie35, angelwithin, twpclerk, moonlightpearl, Vanessa, Wickel, Smile, Eye and Pink Lollipop


                      • #12

                        OMG! Wiz, that sadder event, my deep feelings you and its friends ok
                        I remember myself when my husband suffered an accident, and my father came to inform to me, was horrible, exactly God only in comforting them!

                        I was moved with its history!
                        Mine prayers they will be to all ok


                        • #13
                          How unbelievably sad....I just can't imagine having to deal with the pain. Thinking of you wiz and all concerned. I just don't know what to say. x
                          My BUDDIES Crops, Eye, Jazz, Smile, Sue, Rosana,twpclerk, Moonlightpearl and Vanessa


                          • #14
                            Ohhh Myyy Gosh.... what a horrible moment!!! my heart goes out to the family, losing one in this war must be so painful...I pray every single night for all those serving to come home safe..unfortunately not everyone makes it back... how terribly sad.. Sorry I just dont know what else to say...

                            My Buddies: Jazz, Smile, Sue, Eng and Eye "CHILLS", Poppabob, PKdoll, Onie, Pickngrin


                            • #15
                              Oh god Liz, this is a mother and father's nightmare. We pray for them and know that in our hearts and minds we will be at the side of the road saluting . Take care of yourself also, this is a hard thing for you too be a part of and know that we are here to listen to your every word. Sometimes just getting it out on paper or in here, is a help......Love and Prayer's ....Lois....xoxo